ALL EYES ON ME

Table of Contents

• Commentary
• Music
• Lyrics
• Video
  • Storyline

Commentary

ALL EYES ON ME started with the first few notes of the first verse. I had watched something Shoot From The Hip related the prior day (it might have been this fantastic animated trailer by Livie Graphics), which I suspect was the reason why it wormed its way into the making of this song.

The idea for the MV came upon me in a dream, and the lyrics began to write themselves. The choices I made with the lyrics were both to suit the MV, and to reflect the real theme of the song (more on that later).

Music

This is my first time completing a song using Reaper, and I feel I’ve challenged myself with this, and have learned more about using a DAW to create music. I’ve dabbled a bit with Ableton (for a course) and Cakewalk/Bandlab before, but never regularly to develop any actual real skill.

I used free instruments and plugins to make this piece, with most of the heavy lifting being done by the orchestra (BBC Orchestra: Discover), the saxophone (MONSTER Sax), and parts of the initial piano demo that made it into the final song. The song itself took a month to finish, and more to polish, and the MV took a month and a half to finish all the panels.

Vocals were tough because I didn’t record it in the same session, resulting in different tonal qualities for some of the clips and a bunch of EQ and tweaking. I also don’t particularly like how my voice sounds recorded (a common experience, I’ve heard) and this sort of song isn’t the most suited for my voice to begin with: nevertheless, it was fun, and I hope I was able to do my instrumentals some justice.

My next release will probably be completely original, but I’m glad that this project pulled me and my YouTube channel out of a… two-year hiatus, and encouraged me to work on my skills again.

Lyrics

While the lyrics were fitted to work with the MV (which was loosely based on “All Eyes on Nigel”, an improvised play by Shoot From The Hip), it carries a double meaning. The lyrics are intended to illustrate a person breaking free from under a manipulator, or attention-seeker’s, spell, and the lasting effects of that manipulation even after escaping from that sort of toxic relationship.

I couldn’t help but get
Caught in the middle
Give me a little
Strength
(No I’m not running away)

Got fed up with all your
Bullshit religion
Grandiose visions
Oh
(I know this ain’t going away)

Bullshit religion here is describing the beliefs and values a toxic partner would espouse, and the lies they tell their partner (i.e. gaslighting) in order to retain control and attention.

ALL EYES ON ME
(I couldn’t care more or less)
ALL EYES ON ME

I don’t care if your body’s sacred
That’s a lie, you know that
I will be the
One to bring you
Down

Sometimes, I like to write lyrics that can be interpreted as the last half of one lyric, and the first half of the other. This technique was used in this song for the choruses: here, the two interpretations are:

1. That’s a lie, you know that.
2. You know that I will be the one to bring you down.

Initially, “sacred” was supposed to be “a temple” (inspired by Tom’s monologue in Neighbours Under The Bed, actually) but it was too wordy. “Sacred” reflects the idea of being “untouchable”, which worked with elements of the MV (the “shield of privilege” quote from All Eyes on Nigel—hilarious stuff).

I couldn’t care more or less

For someone who is an attention-seeker, this is something they’d prefer not to hear.

(I couldn’t care more or less)
(I couldn’t care more or less)

I didn’t want to get
Stuck in the middle
Spare me a little
Grace
(Am I going the right way?)

But if I love, I must
Make a decision
So screw your permission
Oh
(No I’ve got nothing more to say)

“But if I love” has two meanings: “if I love someone” and “if I love myself”, the latter being the interpretation aligned with the song itself, and the former being the interpretation aligned with the MV.

This verse was the hardest to get right, as it was the last part of the song I’d left unwritten (the rest falling into place naturally as I re-watched All Eyes on Nigel to complete the lyrics). Some of the alternate lyrics I played with were the following:

You carved your pain
To my bones; made a prison
I’ve made my decision

You’ve took away but I’ve
Made my decision
So screw your derision

If I’m to love I must
Make a decision
So screw your permission

ALL EYES ON ME
(I couldn’t care more or less)
ALL EYES ON ME

Did you think you could play God? Well
All your lies got you where
I need you to
Be the one to
Drown

The phrases that can be derived here are the following:

1. Did you think you could play God well?
2. Well, all your lies got you where I need you to be
3. I need you to be the one to drown

(I justify the abandonment of grammar here for my artistic liberty and choices. If The Killers can have the lyric “are we human, or are we dancer?”, I can do this, too (old man yells at sky))

I couldn’t care more or less

(I couldn’t care more or less)
(I couldn’t care more or less)

ALL EYES
ALL LIES
ALL EYES
ALL LIES

The note I had in my brainstorming document here was: “something hypnotic, almost like a hymn”.

When the morning comes
Will I be undone?
Left behind a scar
Who’d you think you are?

Because despite escaping, there are lasting effects of the trauma you endured that won’t go away, and maybe this is only the beginning of being trapped in a cycle.

If the forest falls
And you’re not around
Did it make a sound?

Based on the “if a tree falls and no one is there to hear it, does it make a sound?” I see these lyrics as a paradox, of how difficult it can be to heal from the shame; the damages to your self-esteem and confidence, that have been inflicted.

It’s the seeds of doubt, a What were you thinking; should I have done that? (You turn around, expecting them to be there, not wanting them to be there, and yet, you wonder if you’ve made the right choice. If you even made a difference: will your life really be better without this person?)

(The answer is, of course, yes, but in that moment, you find yourself unconvinced; hesitant.)

(All eyes)
(All lies)
(All eyes)
(All lies)

Video

I decided to do an MV to practice my (also stagnant) drawing skills. Thus began a tiresome month of drawing nothing but panels upon panels, looking at tons of references, finally having the courage to draw arms and legs and full-body poses, and getting sick of the colour red.

Initially, part of the video was to be coloured: it would be tinted red when Andrew is in Nigel’s hideout, and become coloured again when he is no longer possessed by Nigel’s various eyes. But alas, that would be way too much work.

Wait, did you say possessed?

Storyline

I changed the plot of All Eyes on Nigel to fit the song better, as well as align with my vision of Nigel being surrounded by eyes (a Magnus Archives-esque influence).

Instead of being a drug dealer, in this version of the story, Nigel seeks attention and control, and has paranormal abilities. These abilities are not developed in my head, but probably contain some of the following:

• Being able to see one’s weaknesses and insecurities
• Creating an illusion for the possessed to see a “version of their life” that highlights these weaknesses and insecurities: manipulating the narrative in more ways than one
• Detaching an eye to see what’s happening in the city, like a portable CCTV camera
• Getting blinded by the snow in winter to an astonishing degree (sunglasses only work on the two eyes on his face, after all)

The police force is instead a special team of operatives who go after cases that have paranormal involvement. Andrew has no glasses here simply because I didn’t want to draw them 😅 The designs of the rest weren’t thought about too much, though for some reason I wanted Nigel to have a beauty mark under his eye. AJ’s harpoon character, of course, had “long, flowing hair” as required of the role.

Arabella also has a much larger role in this version, as well as the “BBC News Intern”. Given that the original song’s theme is about getting out of a manipulative situation, I imagine this Arabella and Nigel to have a complicated relationship. “BBC News Intern” gets his development and is promoted from being a side character to being an important background character in this story: on a mission of his own to obtain more information for his news reporting after being sidelined by his colleagues, he is stopped by Arabella before having a heart-to-heart with her and convincing her that this isn’t right.

Arabella, deciding she’s finally had enough of Nigel’s bullshit, hits him in his Achilles’ heel; the vulnerable spot around his heart. However, it’s not the knife that weakens him: it’s the shock from having someone he thought would always be by his side and go along with his ways suddenly turn around and break that trust. He’s more confused, and upset, than angered.

Other than these changes, most of the storyline runs loosely with the original storyline of the play. If you haven’t watched the play this song is based on, do yourself a favour and watch it here.